SWEEEEEEEEEEEP!!!!

I may have nearly died of a heat stroke, but I returned from St. Louis a VERY happy woman. Three days, three games and three exciting wins make this another doozy for the record books. With a win on Thursday night before we even arrived, the Cardinals were able to complete a 4 game sweep of San Diego and catapult themselves within 2 games of the Scrubbies. (Who lost two of three to Houston over the weekend. So sad!) Not a bad way to kick things off after the All-Star break, eh?

We kicked the weekend off in true Trumbull fashion on Friday night by attending the Champion's Club at Busch Stadium, where we were encouraged to drink excessively. With a license to eat and drink whatever we wanted, you best believe we were prepared to get our money's worth! As it turns out, we needed all the sustenance we could get, as the game lasted for what felt like 9 hours. When it was all said and done, there were 24 combined base hits and 18 runs. Ryan Ludwick smacked a 3 run homer in the 4th (his 22nd) and Ricky Ankiel fought through a 12 pitch at-bat in the 7th for his 22nd dinger of the year. Plus, a ton of other stuff happened, including Braden Looper looking anything but inspiring. He was as sharp as a doorknob right out of the gate and ultimately capped off his gem of a performance with a two-run homer to Jody Gerut in the 4th. Fortunately, five relievers were able to combine for six innings and gave up only one additional run on four hits. In fact, despite some cynical prognostications from my mother, even Jason Isringhausen didn't totally embarrass himself. (No, he saved that for Sunday. More on that later!) After 4 more runs in the 8th, the Cards won it 11-7 and we stumbled back to the hotel drunk on victory.

Without a doubt, the coolest thing that happened on Friday night was me skyrocketing to inevitable fame after being flashed on the Jumbotron. My Dad and I participated in a pre-taped segment before the game in which they asked us what we thought the Padres were named after. I mumbled and stuttered like an idiot without a clue, which was apparently amusing enough to use in the final piece. We're still trying to figure out what they must have done with the footage they shot of Dad, as he carried on for a good few minutes about monks, robes and the color of his own eyes. We came to a joint conclusion that it's being used to entertain the vendors in the breakroom.

Saturday began with a trip to the Cardinals Team Store, where I purchased more crap I most certainly do not need. Following a light lunch of cheeseburgers, fries and pizza at J. Bucks, we hauled our buns back to the ballpark for the 2:55 start. And let me tell you something...it was HOT. We were naturally sitting right in direct sunlight and it got so toasty by the third inning that I was actually running out of places to wipe my sweat. It also got downright depressing as Todd Wellemeyer gave up 5 runs in the first two innings before finally settling the heck down. (He was able to then pitch scorelessly until he was removed in the 7th and retired 14 of the final 16 batters he faced.) Albert Pujols hit a three-run double in the 5th to pull it within 2. After RBI singles by both Rick Ankiel and Skip Schumaker, Big Al knocked in one more in the 6th to put the Redbirds ahead for the 6-5 win. Seriously...that man is a freak of nature. I don't remember what they're paying him, but I'm sure it's nowhere near what he's worth. He's like a superhero or something.

Anyway, the crew was getting a little weary by Sunday. We'd gone out for a celebratory Italian feast on Saturday night that had left a few of us a bit, shall we say...dehydrated. Combined with the impending 96 degree heat we'd been promised for that afternoon, pretty much all of us were convinced we were going to pass out and die by the 4th inning. Luckily, that didn't happen or we would have missed one of the most awesome endings to a game that I've ever seen. None of us had great expectations going in, as both Pujols and Yadier Molina were resting and Jaime Garcia was on the mound for his first major league start EVER. However, it ended up being a wild game in which the Cardinals came from behind in the 8th, saw the lead evaporate courtesy of Jason Isringhausen in the top of the 9th and surged back for good in the bottom of that same inning with an Aaron Miles walk-off grand slam. Albert Pujols was brought in to scare the crap out of people in the 8th, which is when Troy Glaus hit a 3-run bomb to put the Cards in front. This being the Cardinals bullpen (leading the Majors with 23 blown saves!) that wasn't going to be nearly enough run support. Izzy and Little Brad Thompson proceeded to cough up enough meatballs to tie things up, which actually made things far more exciting in the end. So, thanks for being so frustratingly poor at throwing baseballs, gentleman! Anyway, after Pujols drew a walk and made it to third on a failed pick-off attempt, both Yadi and Skippy were intentionally walked. Enter Mr. Miles and his big fat grandie! WOOHOO!!!!! I needed multiple martinis, a big steak AND some cheesecake in order to adequately celebrate that ridiculous hot mess of an afternoon. (I should mention that I also desperately required a SHOWER.) St. Louis now has 24 come-from-behind wins and 12 final-at-bat wins this year. I'm being told that means these guys are a scrappy bunch of ballplayers. I'm personally inclined to think it means they're a bunch of damn drama queens, but either way I hope they keep it up.

So, now...despite dropping two in a row to Milwaukee (including the game Monday night in which we nearly came back AGAIN!), we are still resting just 2 games behind the first place Scrubbies and 1 behind the now second place Brewers. This ought to make the rest of this season a complete and total NIGHTMARE. I'm tired of hearing about the wild card race already! Anyway, I'm headed back to Iowa this weekend, which means I'll be able to catch a couple more games on TV. (I'm not terribly concerned with seeing any of the people that live there, considering I ran into three different groups of people from my hometown at different times over the weekend. To be honest, it kind of creeped me out.) It would be really special if we could split this series with the Brew Crew and go into the weekend with some momentum. I suppose the good news is that either way, I'll be able to watch those games without having to deal with sweat and sunblock running into my eyes or my legs sticking to the bottom of my seat. See, that's just how I am, people. Always looking on the bright side of things! It's amazing how delusional you can get with the right amount of sun and alcohol poisoning.

So, wait...WHAT?

Holy crap. Holy FREAKING crap. As I write this, the St. Louis Cardinals are leading the Milwaukee Brewers 3-0 going into the 8th inning of the last in this three game series. Of which they've won the previous two. Deductive reasoning therefore suggests that the Cardinals are on their way towards sweeping the Brewers. Adding to that, the Birds were 11-4 going into this game and tied with Arizona for the best current record in major league baseball. I'm not even sure how to properly process this information. Am I dead?

Some highlights: Wainwright pitched 7 2/3 innings last night, giving up two runs on five hits in a 5-4 win. He also hit a solo home run and a single. He is apparently awesome at everything. Also, Ricky Ankiel forced a 1st inning, 17 pitch plate appearance into a walk. SEVENTEEN PITCHES. That is, I believe, a pretty solid at-bat. It should therefore be noted that he is ALSO awesome. Then, the Cardinals extended their collective awesomeness into Tuesday with a 6-1 win. According to the MLB.com recap, "The Cardinals won with 12 hits, 11 of them singles, from eight different players. Seven different Redbirds either scored a run, drove one in, or both." Also, even though Braden Looper gave up five walks, he only allowed a single run. So even when he kind of sucks, he is STILL awesome.

In summary, to my complete and utter surprise, the Cardinals are winning lots of baseball games. I did not see this coming. However, in case I have not made it abundantly clear, this is...well, AWESOME.

The Week That Was...

Before I get carried away with my long weekend at Lollapalooza, I just want to make some comments on the major plot points from the past week.

1. When it was all said and done, our dynamite winning streak coming out of the Brewers series ended at four games. While not impressive to most baseball fans, I believe this is the longest winning streak we've had all season. So...there's that. WEEEEEE!!!!! Of course, we followed that up with a blowout 15-1 loss to the freakin Pirates last night thanks to Braden Looper looking the exact opposite of awesome. In how many games have we given up 10+ runs this year? Whatever the number, I'm sure it's positively disgusting and I'm better off not knowing. (SIDE NOTE: Speaking of the Pirates, what is up with making our old pal Matt Morris the highest paid pitcher in their starting rotation? Matt Morris? REALLY???? Isn't he in a nursing home by now?)

2. I was in an AWESOME mood on Monday night. The Cards had the night off, so our beautiful three game winning streak was intact and I had happy visions of a playoff run in my head. I also got invited to accompany a friend to the Cubs game that evening and had the fine pleasure of watching them lose pretty convincingly to the Phillies. The best part was doing so surrounded by drunk Philadelphians in the bleachers. I really have to hand it to east coast sports fans. They are totally batshit CRAZY. It made for an entertaining evening to say the least.

3. I could not sleep early Tuesday morning. I woke up at 5 AM for some ungodly reason and couldn't fall back asleep because I was feverishly strategizing the Redbirds' late season comeback. I think that suggests I might have a legitimate problem/obsession. However, Tony and Walt should really give me a call, as I think I pretty much got everything figured out. Early bird gets the worm, you know?

4. The Cubs are tied for first place, BLAH, BLAH BLAH. Tell someone who gives a damn. And for the love of everything holy, stop whining about it. If I hear one more person say to me, "We've been bad for so long, just let us have it!" I'm going to stuff their teeth down their esophagus. Did I say anything? I don't think so. In fact, I'm pretty sure I've avoided discussing the Cubs lately because they put me in BAD MOOD. I can't argue with statistics, folks. The Cubs have won more games then we have this year. What do you want from me, a goddamn cookie? My humble opinion is that everyone should save all their blowharding until the team actually does something significant like, oh, I don't know...make the playoffs.

5. This weekend is going to be awesome. I'm going to give my baseball passion a couple days off in order to focus on another. (And no, I don't mean drinking, although I'm sure there will be plenty of that!) Lots of good shows to be seen and if I'm lucky, the Cards will start another four game winning streak tonight while the Cubs fall victim to a Mets sweep and Tom Glavine's 300th win while I'm on hiatus. I guess I'll find out when I sober up on Monday. Cheers!

Good News for People Who Love Bad News

Well, the good news is St. Louis finally snapped a five game losing streak this weekend. In front of an emotional home crowd, the Cards topped the Astros in their first win since Josh Hancock's passing and gave a beleaguered fan base a small taste of hope. Adam Wainwright, although far from flawless, performed more efficiently then he has in weeks giving up only 2 runs in six innings, while Chris Duncan and Albert Pujols drove home the runs necessary to secure the win. Of course, this was rendered completely irrelevant on Saturday, as they floundered about and gave up 13 runs to their whopping big fat ZERO. For those keeping track at home, that would be the team's 12th loss in 17 games. This also marked the end of Albert Pujols' 12 game hitting streak as he went 0-4. ARRGGH!!!

Ahem...sorry. This is supposed to be the optimistic and uplifting portion of this post. Continuing with the good news, Looper had another solid start on Sunday leading the Redbirds to their first series victory since coming to Wrigley in April. Scott Rolen finally got his groove on and shook himself out of an 0-25 hitting skid and Jason Isringhausen came in to save his 8th game in 9 chances. Of course, Looper was dinged for a run in the first, which continues to add to the team's consistent struggles in the first frame. They have been outscored 21-3 in the first this season. Considered collectively, the Cards have a 12 -17 record which is good enough to continue their stay in the Last Place Motel indefinitely. WOOHOOO!!!

Further exacerbating the Redbird's woes is the announcement that Chris Carpenter will be out for at least another three months as he undergoes arthroscopic surgery on his elbow. Add this to the fact that I had tickets to see the Cubs finish a sweep of the Nationals yesterday in dramatic extra innings fashion and I'm about ready to take a bath with a hair dryer. AAAAAAAARRRRRRRGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

In summary, there is just not enough good news.

Absence Truly Does Make The Heart Grow Fonder

So, I leave town for a couple days and guess what? We finally win some games! WEEEEEE!! After a brief sojourn in my native Iowan town (where I can actually watch televised coverage of Cardinal baseball,) I am happy to report that we were able to take two of three from the Astros and another today against the Pirates. Adam Wainwright and Kip Wells pitched another couple of great games and Braden Looper sounded lights out today. (Back in Chicago, I'm forced to listen to the play-by-play on XM Radio.) It even appears that Mr. Albert Pujols himself is joining in on the fun! You can only imagine how much this settles my nerves. I might not even have to drink tonight. (Well, not as MUCH anyway.)

Plus, today was the home opener for the Cubs and it looks like they crapped the bed again. Considering how cold it was outside, I'm surprised so many people showed up to watch. However, on my evening commute home there were plenty of drunken morons parading around Wrigleyville tempting me to run them over. (I even saw one dude biff it and smack his head on a fire hydrant. He must have taken the loss exceptionally hard.)

This must be God's way of telling me I need to visit my parents more often. Duly noted.

So Far, So Good!

Hey kids, we're off to an AMAZING start! Two games, two losses to veteran (read: OLD!) pitchers, a few base running mistakes, three defensive errors, nine base runners stranded in scoring position and approximately 97 balls swatted into double plays. Then, to add insult to injury, Carpenter is missing his next start as a "precautionary measure" against swelling in his right elbow. That's just freakin' wonderful.

In more positive news, Kip Wells showed promise in his first start and fans got to see the first home run of the year at Busch Stadium, courtesy of Scott Rolen. Someone should go ahead and order those 2007 championship T-shirts, don't you think? We're on FIRE!!

At least we have the Braden Looper start going for us tonight. Wait a second...

Speaking of Looper, I have it on good authority from a Mets fan friend of mine that while he was in New York he did some side work as a circus attraction with Carlos Beltran's mole and the bearded lady. True story.